I feel so detached from this Christian community. Where I'm suppose to find love and feel loved, I do not get it. I know that I'm being tested constantly in this area of my life, where the devil is using loneliness to get me back into the world.I'm facing dreams that seem so far away, discouragements that seem to disagree with every single action that I take, temptations that made me so caught up with the trends of the world, the things that non-christians seem to delight themselves in. Life all a sudden seem meaningless to me, is there all to life then just eating merrily, amassing accolades and achievements, becoming filthily rich and wait for your own deathbed. Yet one thing I know is that no matter what circumstance I'm going through right now, all the trials and temptations and loneliness, God you are always there with me. When I couldn't overcome it anymore because my legs are tied down with shackles, you carried me through. Because of that, I know that no matter how rich or poor I am, how strong or weak I am, how smart or stupid I am, it really doesn't matter. All I need to know is that I have a God who can do more than what we can imagine. That he will empower me to rise up above the occasion. I thank you for placing all these tough times in my life because when I am weak, you will be strong. When I am lesser in life, you will be more in my life. When you have tested me in this furnace, I shall shine forth as gold.