One more week...

Let go of the Past and Move on

Take responsibility for learning from past successes, as well as past mistakes or setbacks both your own and those of others. IT's okay to visit the past; but just don't live in it. And if the past hurts: don't re-watch a bad movie. Many people seem too busy replaying their past, that they miss the present and don't spend time creating their future. If you want to Go and make a difference (MAD) in the future, you must be willing to let go of the past after taking the learning from you.

"Learn from yesterday, live for today, hope for tomorrow. THe important thing is not to stop questioning."


"You can let the past keep hold of you, or you can choose to take hold of the future."

Sometimes it is good to forget who you really are because in that way, you will be able to accomplish feats that are beyond your wildest imagination.

A journey of a thousand miles begin with a single step.


GP. A word that is unheard of for ages. Is it even possible now?

My greatest enemy is none other than myself.

It's time to pick myself up and move along. No point crying over spilled milk, mulling over things that I should have done but did not do, regretting over wrong decisions that I have made previously that still affects me currently. I believe that whatever the mind can conceive and believe, it can achieve. I'm not going to be the same anymore. I need the grace to accept with serenity the things that cannot be changed. courage to change the things that can be changed, and the wisdom to distinguish the one from the other.


Don't go around saying that the world owes you a living. The world owes you nothing. It was here first.

Happiness is yet to be until one realizes that he has accomplished something. For now, it's an element that is still missing in my life. Until my goal is achieved.

Je veux étudier la médecine, mais qui va me sponsoriser ?


Things of this world is irrelevant to me.

quinze juillet 2009

Sometimes you desire for something so much but you can't have it, you no longer want to pursue it anymore.


Mon Seigneur, mon Seigneur, pourquoi m'avez-vous renoncé ?

FUCK Why are some people so insensitive to others. Is it really hard for one to understand and put themselves into the shoes of others.

Knock you down
[Keri Hilson]
Not again
Oh this ain't supposed to happen to me

[Kanye West]
Keep rockin and keep knockin'
Whether you're Louie Vuittonin' it up, or Reebokin'
You see the hate that they serving on a plater
So what we gon have dessert or disaster?

[Keri Hilson]
I never thought I'd be in love like this
When I look at you my mind goes on a trip
Then you came in and knocked me on my face
Feels like I'm in a race but I already won first place
I never thought I fall for you as hard as I did (as hard as I did, yeah)
You got me thinking about our life, our house and kids (Yeah)
Every morning I look at you and smile
Cause boy you came around and you knocked me down (knocked me down)

[Chorus]
Sometimes love comes around (love comes around, love comes around)
and it knocks you down
just get back up
when it knocks you down (knocks you down)
Sometimes love comes around
and it knocks you down
just get back up
when it knocks you down (knocks you down)

[Ne-Yo]
I never thought I hear myself say
Ya'll gon hate
I think I'm going to kick it with my girl today
I used to be commander-in-chief for my pimp ship flying high
Till i met this pretty little missile, who shot me out the sky
So now I'm crashing don't know how it happened
but i know it feels so damn good
Said if i could go back and make it happen faster
don't you know i would baby if i could
Miss independent, to the fullest, the load never too much
she helping me pull it, she shot bullet that ended that life
I swear to you the pimp in me just died tonight
girl sometimes love

Sometimes love comes around (love comes around, love comes around)
and it knocks you down
just get back up
when it knocks you down (knocks you down)
Sometimes love comes around
and it knocks you down
just get back up
when it knocks you down (knocks you down)

[Kanye West]
Tell me now can you make past your caspers
So we could finally fly off into NASA
You was always the cheerleader of my dreams
to seem to only date the head of football teams,
and i was the class clown that always kept you laughing
we were never meant to be, baby we just happened
so please don't mess up the trick,
hey young world, i'm the new slick rick,
they say i move to quick but we can't let this moment past us,
let the hour glass pass right into ashes
let the wind blow the ashes right before my glasses
so i wrote this love letter right before my classes
how could a goddess ask someone that's only average, for advice
o-m-g you listen to that bitch?
woah is me, baby this is tragic
cause we had it, we was magic
i was flying, now i'm crashing
this is bad, real bad, michael jackson
now i'm mad, real mad, joe jackson
you should leave your boyfriend now, i'ma ask him

[Keri Hilson]
so you gotta take the good with the bad, the happy and the sad
or will you bring the better future then i had in the past
cause i don't want to make the same mistakes i did
i don't wanna fall back on my face again
woah, woah
i'll admit it, i was scared to answer loves call
woah, woah
and if it hits, better make it worth the fall

(When it comes around)

Sometimes love comes around (love comes around, love comes around)
and it knocks you down
just get back up
when it knocks you down (knocks you down)
Sometimes love comes around (comes around)
and it knocks you down
just get back up
when it knocks you down (knocks you down)

Won’t see it coming when it happens
but when it happens you’re gonna feel it, let me tell you now
you see when love comes knocks you down

Won’t see it coming when it happens
but when it happens you’re gonna feel it, let me tell you now
you see when love knocks you down

Almost died while jogging just now. Had minor chest pains. Figured out that I'm still a little too young to leave so early. Still have big plans and ambitions, drive a nice car, play my basketball games and the happiness of being with my loved ones and enjoying gourmets under the moonlight by the seaside. Made me realised how fragile human life actually is. All the recent deaths reported by the news, an officer being pinned down by a land rover and a polytechnic student who died after being kicked on the neck further confirmed my realisation. Feeling older as each second passes, I wonder how long more then will my youth fade or would I even live till that day. Somehow thats the thing that has been bothering me for the past few weeks. Made me learn to cherish the people around me more and the things around. Youth is indeed something that money certainly cannot buy. No matter how much you spend on cosmetics, surgeries or vitality pills. One day we will still bid this world goodbye eventually.

Life is just tough. But hardships don't last, only tough people last.


Pouvez-vous marcher ce voyage avec moi ?

Optimism fades into pessimism, happiness overshadowed by sorrow, ability being overtaken by disability, strengths overpowered by flaws, affection drained by hatred. Everything now seems insignificant and meaningless.

La vie est vraiment dénuée de sens ?

huit juin 2009

Another normal day at work, going through the same lifestyle again. Waking up at 5.30am, catching the 6am bus. Sleep on the bus till 6.55am before reaching my stop. Take the shuttle bus into my base at 7am and reach the base ard 7.20am. Walk through the security check, take another shuttle bus from the guard house into the medical centre. Approximately reaching my office at 7.30am. Change into No.3 uniform, change into my contact lenses and munch my fruit while doing something all the way until 8.15am when my supervisor will step in and assign tasks for me to do. And the list goes on...

I really pity people who sign on with the SAF. This is the kind of routine and regimental lifestyle that they have to go through everyday assuming that they are admin bounded. It's such a pity to waste your life doing unexciting stuffs, talking to the same old people, trying to make your life happier by forcing urself to smile at every single thing that is happening around you. Life should be action-packed, one that is filled with exploration of the things unknown, with adventures fraught with small dangers lurking at every crevices and unexpected surprises planted at every juncture of the journey. As good as it may sound, it can only be found in films such as Indiana Jones, James Bond etc.. Sometimes I wish that what happens in movies will take place in reality. The media portrays serving in the military as something honorable and mind-blowing. But the truth is that it actually blows your mind off. Literally in this case. The reasons are almost self-explanatory. Oh well, looking at the brighter side, 7 months has passed. Small figures do really make a large difference.

Looking forward seems to be the last remaining option left for me.

sept juin 2009

Ate manhattan fish's market ytd and Aston's chicken today. Super fulfiling! It's sort of a way to pamper myself since i have no other means of spending my money other than on food. Taking my real final theory test of driving end of this month. Can't wait to get a driving license. Then hopefully by some chance I will have the money to get a car by end of this year so that travelling will be much easier. Transportation services doesn't favour nocturnal creatures like me. So therefore, self sufficiency would be the key solution to night activities.

Everyone seems busy nowadays. Preparation for exams, busy working, getting warmed up for freshman year in university. This sets me thinking that the life is singapore is really too fast-paced for me. We seem to always be in a rush that having nothing to do can actually be something enjoyable. Chilling out in beaches, watching the sunrise, cycling in parks, having picnic by the seaside, watching the sunset. All this seemingly trivial stuffs can actually be quite meaningful. At least it provides distraction from the reality that we are socially engineered into and the harshness of the nostalgic past that we are so reluctant to let go. There is a time to come and a time to go for everything. My time's just not up yet so remaining is the only option left. Tilll then will i be set free.

I hung up the phone tonight
Something happened for the first time
Deep inside
It was a rush, what a rush
Cause the possibility
that you would ever feel the same way
About me
It's just too much, just too much

Why do I keep running from the truth
All I ever think about is you
You got me hypnotized, so mesmerized
And I just got to know

Do you ever think
When you're all alone
All that we can be
Where this thing can go
Am I crazy or falling in love
Is it real or just another crush
Do you catch a breath
When I look at you
Are you holding back
Like the way I do
Cause I'm tryin, tryin to walk away
But I know this crush aint goin away
Yeah, yeah yeah yeah
Goin away
Yeah yeah yeah yeah

Has it ever cross your mind
When were hangin, spending time girl,
Are we just friends
Is there more, is there more
See it's a chance we've gotta take
Cause I believe that we can make this into
Something that will last, last forever, forever

Do you ever think
When you're all alone
All that we can be
Where this thing can go
Am I crazy or falling in love
Is it real or just another crush
Do you catch a breath
When I look at you
Are you holding back
Like the way I do
Cause I'm tryin, tryin to walk away
But I know this crush aint goin away
Yeah, yeah yeah yeah
Goin away
Yeah yeah yeah yeah

Why do I keep running from the truth
All I ever think about is you
You got me hypnotized, so mesmerized
And I just got to know

Do you ever think
When you're all alone
All that we can be
Where this thing can go
Am I crazy or falling in love
Is it real or just another crush
Do you catch a breath
When I look at you
Are you holding back
Like the way I do
Cause I'm tryin, tryin to walk away
But I know this crush aint goin away
Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah
Goin away
Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah

(Goin away yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah)
Do you ever think
When you're all alone
All that we can be
Where this thing can go
(Goin away yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah)
Do you catch a breath
When I look at you
Are you holding back
Like the way I do

Had my first french lessons at Alliance Francaise. The teacher is not bad, just that her method of teaching is quite scary but nevertheless entertaining. Somehow she reminds me of a model, just that she lacked the model height although the facial features and figure is there. Look young for her age.

Anyway ate the most filling meal of the year at Kublai Khan Mongolian BBQ Buffet. Cost an extravagant price of 28.60 each pax. Practically like spammed all the food into plates and plates and in the end couldn't finish all the food. Photos not with me though. The buffet ended up in a high notes as we tried many means to dispose the food without being found out since food wasters will be slapped with a hefty fine. Some of us tried to hide the food in tissue papers, in the cups, or just disfigure the food so that it seems like we have taken a chunk off the food. Quite an unsightly scene though. Haha. In the end i jusst chose to finish my share! But ended up going home with a bigger than usual stomach and a heavier mass. Oh well, it's gonna be bball tmrw morning again so hopefully i can regain my normal mass again.

Used to look forward to weekends becos of all the interesting events that are lined up for me. But it seems like life is turning for the worst now as people start leaving, then office turns chaotic, hwk start piling in and new faces start surfacing. It's like having to adapt to a different set of culture every week. Not that i'm not used to it but it's quite tiring having to change my habit again and again. Oh well, just another 500 plus more days and i shall regain back my freedom. For now I shall just self entertain and find means to enjoy this NS life.

Just realised that my blog lacked photos becos NSFs are not allowed to bring any image capturing device. I shall start bringing a camera out during weekends instead. It's always good to capture the moment and treasure it for a lifetime so that when we look back at the photo, a smile is almost always guaranteed. Pictures of the unforgettable sad past however haunts me constantly and it is a rather mean feat to just delete them all away. At least there are several joyous occasions to look back at and hopefully pray for more to come my way.

"For I know the plans I have for you, declares the Lord, plans to prosper you and not to harm you, plans to give you a hope and a future."
And you will seek me and find me when you seek me with all your heart.

I officially declare that today's one of the most boring days of my life because of SAF parade day. Although i declare myself a loyalist to Singapore but this ain't the right way to torture innocent civilians/ military personnel. We went to the parade 2.5 hours early than usual becos of some screwed up arrangements by some WO. Then sat there and stone and listen to the parade commander practising his commands, listening to some random songs and reading my lecture notes. Army parades are very boring especially when you have only one companion next to u and surrounded by an army of regulars and officers/ enciks. Everyone seems to know each other and communicating in some kind of language that only their own parties know. Oh well, I have learnt my lesson. To keep myself scarce when occasions like this occur. At least I have my HP to keep myself occupied while waiting for time to fly or rather crawl.

Humans are strange because we only cherish a person when he or she is no longer around instead of cherishing them when they are around.